Buddy System
The vast majority of people are committed to looking out for friends. This is true when it comes to general well-being, in situations at work or school, or when going out. Using the buddy system is one way to have each other’s backs. Here is some guidance for creating an effective buddy system.
When going out with friends:
Make a planÂ
- Make sure you all have each other's cell numbers.
- Commit to not ditching someone if they have too much to drink and/or become difficult.
- Make sure you drink with people who will take care of you if you drink too much.
- Stay with the same group of friends the entire night and make sure everyone gets home safely.
- Check-in with friends if the plan you all made for the night needs to change or is falling apart.
- Agree to discourage someone from doing something embarrassing or dangerous.
- Share location with each other on an app like Find Friends or Glympse.
- Agree on a way to communicate and regroup if people get separated.
- Have a code word, sign, or text emoji that means, "get me out of this situation."
- If something goes wrong during the night, talk about what happened later and try to make a better plan for future nights.
Why checking in matters
- Making a commitment to check-in with the group prevents some members of the group from making decisions without the input of others.
- This decreases the likelihood that someone will have to rely on less known friends or strangers to get home, which can create risk for something bad happening.
Commit to follow-up
If something goes wrong during the night, talk about what happened at a later time and try to make a better plan for future nights.
- Talk about how people should approach problems with each other.
- Avoid coming across as judgmental or demanding.
- Simply “warning†people or telling people they are wrong isn’t helpful.
- Approach people with empathy to talk about why the plan was important in the first place. This can be a challenge if people have had too much to drink, but you can be direct yet supportive at the same time.
- We can’t always anticipate when something might go wrong. If something bad happens, switch into support mode and avoid blaming people.